If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
