I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
