Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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