a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
The adults are the big ones right?
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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