Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
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So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
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I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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