Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize
