i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
