A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
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