Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
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