did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
