another moral hangover. fuck.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
