Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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