Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
