this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
