Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I would fuck him just for his dog
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