how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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