What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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