I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
the night ended with taco bell and tears
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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