just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
