He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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