Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize