Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(317): View more from Indiana

did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more

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(708): View more from Illinois

I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.

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(858): View more from California

Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts

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(512): View more from Texas

I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.

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These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
Read it at the TFLN blog
(561): View more from Florida

He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.

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(386): View more from Florida

Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now

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(661): View more from California

How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.

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(305): View more from Florida

why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?

(908): View more from New Jersey

i hope they name him Joffrey

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(408): View more from California

I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success

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