Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
