I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
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