I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
