My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
