well I can't set my house on fire every night
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
