I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
