I don't think brook has ever known best
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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