You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize
