it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
