I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
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