I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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