are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
