i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
