it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I'm bleeding and have questions
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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