we have pet lesbian snakes
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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