i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Randomize
