Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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