My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
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