Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
