I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
everyone is single if you try hard enough
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize