They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
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