whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
