She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
