This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
