It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
