I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
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