Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Randomize
