Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
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As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
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